Really Short Reviews

Because I've seen and continue to see so many movies, I thought I would try rapid, really short reviews of a handful of movies that I have less to say about because realistically, am I really going to get all the films I've seen down in full review form any time soon? Let's try and see how it goes:

Jezebel (1938)- Pre-Scarlett O'Hara Hollywood melodrama. A lot of frilly costumes and grandiose sets, attention to detail being obvious but humanity or real emotion apparently being mistaken for big studio budget. A boring and unnecessary film, sporting a rare miss-fire performance from Bette Davis.

Being John Malkovich (1999)- Clever and showing ingenuity but also a little smug and self-important. The women, Catherine Keener and Cameron Diaz, shine. The men, John Cusack and yes, John Malkovich, are not as interesting. The script is terrific, if a little grating in its self-proclaimed QUARKINESS, but the film itself feels light-weight.

Charade (1963)- A faux-Hitchcock that's just about as good. Audrey Hepburn and Carey Grant are at their delightfully sumptuous best. A cocktail of a movie, fun and eye-catching, yes, not extremely memorable and kind of frilly, but hey, truly enjoyable entertainment.

Child's Play (1988)- Deranged doll terrorizes family. Yeah, I thought this film was going to be better than it was. As it stands, it's an insipid, mindless slice-and-dice of little interest to anyone, albeit a true horror fan of the supposed "classics". Alex Vincent's performance as our young hero was like listening to a cat get dragged across a blackboard. Unpleasant. The film, worst of all, isn't scary, or inversely, bad enough to be truly funny.

Inferno (1980)- Visually stunning but lacking a cohesive or credible story. Only check this one out if you're a fan of Dario Argento's. Dreamy, eye-catching visuals are burdened with grade Z acting and Keith Emerson's grating score. A kind of half sequel to Argento's better Suspiria, check that film out if you're looking for at least a little more meat on your candy colored bone.

Paranormal Activity (2009)- A Blair Witch rip-off that is better paced and yet stilled managed to be un-engaging at times. Often, actually. The performances are not as raw or as genuine as those in The Blair Witch Project, but they're surprisingly naturalistic. The film has some moments worth savoring, but not quite enough to validate the film's need to exist.

Sherlock Holmes (2009)- Robert Downey Jr. has fun in the lead but it's unfortunate how obvious it is that Rachel McAdams and Jude Law try hard to make something interesting out of characters lifeless on the page. The film's mildly entertaining but isn't spectacularly dumb nor terribly smart. So it just kind of sits there. And hey, that isn't real London scenery! That's all CGI!

The Da Vinci Code (2006)- Religious broohaha run amok. Yawn. Hanks's performance is without enthusiasm and the direction is perfunctory and typical. What can I say, I hated this film.

Do these work?